So Pretty

...It's been awhile

Writing used to let me express myself .. mostly the deeper parts of myself, the parts that don't get to be expressed during the course of a day.  Sure, everyone wants to hear the good stuff or the "socially acceptable" problems ... but my writing ... that was the safe place that let me venture to say some of the inner thoughts my mind thought or the darker version of what I wanted to say to the lady that has the nerve to give me the once over cause I'm wearing a low cut shirt.  My writing was a time my mind did the talking and my fingers did the walking.

I got what I deserved for basically having an online diary as my dad calls this "blogging thing" ... I was foolish to believe that if a person wondered onto MY blog there is the common understanding that these are my thoughts; my feelings; my past issues or my present joys.  They aren't yours.  Sure feel free to comment good or bad; that I am fine with, but to literally take it to the level some people took it was shocking and absurd.  Nonetheless, they got their way, they removed my desire to write about anything .. good or bad.

I know this is a question that can't really be answered but I wonder how many of us have secret blogs with a secret identity that would allow us to freely express our self without the concern of what a family member thinks, or where they can openly express their frustration with a spouse or parent w/o "airing their dirty laundry" for all to see.  A place that desires can be written and talked about without people drawing imaginary letter A's on ones clothing.  My mom didn't like lots of my posts cause they made me appear sad.  My husband didn't like my openness about my past in my blogs cause it appeared I wasn't "over" things.  My brother thought many posts were "inappropriate" ... my sister .. lol, she just looked at the pictures.  None said, I'm glad you have a place to express yourself.  Maybe that is too much to ask, hell if I know. 

I wish writing in a public forum didn't have to be so hard.  I wish I didn't have to write about what everyone else thinks is appropriate.  My writing is yet another avenue I paint a smile over and write what is expected to be written about or I don't write at all.  I know some would say, "screw 'em" write what you wanna write, but in the "real" world can one really say and do that??

Wish I could say more but I'll break myself back into blogging slow .. wouldn't want to pull a finger muscle.

Idea ... wanna play?

So I am thinking I want a summer slide show.  But not just any slide show, I want to create one that incorporates EVERYONE'S summer.  So here is the thought ... if everyone sends me a few of their favorite summer pics then I could attempt to create a fun slide show with music to share with everyone else?!!? 

I think it would be a good tribute to Summer 2009!!  You don't even have to know me to participate, just send me your pictures. 

Feelings never stay the same

 Have you ever stopped and reflected on something in your life?  Of course, we all have, but have you ever reflected upon something, size up your opinions, feelings or what have you only to days, weeks, months or even years later, look back again and find you feel a lot differently now than you did at the time of the first reflection??

How are we as a human race supposed to get a grip on our feelings and learn from our choices or mistakes if our opinions on life/people are constantly changing.  No wonder therapists are rolling in the dough; their job is as secure as the guy who picks up the elephant shit at a circus.  Both jobs are going to be there the next day because while they do their job to the best of their abilities there will still be more shit to deal with the next day!

Now matter how much we mean or feel something at the time we say it one word, one phone call, one picture, one letter, one tear drop ... one ANYTHING can change it all instantly.  So did that make us liars the moment before that "one" thing happened?  I suppose not since we meant what we felt or said at the time we say it but it still leads me back to the quandary: How are we supposed to get a grip on our lives, emotions and state of being when things are never really as they seem ... when in seconds something can change the way you thought of something/someone for over a decade.

 
 

So Pretty Revived and Refreshed

I have been ignoring my blog and to be honest its been on purpose because I wasn't happy with the direction of my blog.  I started this blog many moons ago to express my views, opinions, funniness  and randomness to bring out the inner pretty in all of us and now it's just a Mommy Blog.  Don't get me wrong, I love Mommy Blogs but I want this blog to have more to it then just quick updates about the kids.  But I started to censor what I wrote because each topic I thought of might offend, hurt or bother one of the people that reads my blog.  I thought about starting another blog with a stealth identity ... maybe use my gangsta name as my cover??  LOL  But let's be honest, I do good to maintain one blog no less two.

I was re-united with a friend from middle school and he and I were talking about blogs and he posted a blog back in February that explains my feelings better than I could ever dream of explaining them.  He has re-motivated me.  I highly reccomend you take time to look at his posts .. what I have read of his blog I have really enjoyed.

So stay tuned for my next blog : Things aren't what they seem .. or are they? 

I am going to revive this baby and hopefully people will accept that this is my place to talk and they will read with open minds and comment as they feel necessary or lead.

Camping!

I was able to sneak off for the first time this year with the family and we got to spend four days out camping, hiking, fishing and eating WAY too many calories.  Seriously, why do S'Mores have to be SOO darn addicting?  Actually my weakness is just the roasted marshmellows but a little chocolate and graham never hurt anyone, lol.  Okay okay it hurt my diet a bit but who cares, I was on vacation!!!

I am proud to announce that I weathered my first storm in a tent.  It was scary and I was not happy with my husband for making me sit in a tent as the wind blew 60 MPH and the hail and rain came upon us like there was no tomorrow BUT our nifty new tent didn't let us down.  It stay in place and never let in a drop of rain.  We would have been in perfect shape had my husband and I not left the playpen for Princess P out on the "Porch" of our tent.  As we argued over whose fault it was that the tent was getting soaked my ever so clever 9 year old calmly asks .. "well is someone going to GET the playpen"? ... at that we laughed and go the playpen inside and began to have a pillow fight to keep our minds off the ever growing storm. 

When hiking you should not let the 9 year old take lead.  We started off on our first hike of the trip which was supposed to be a simple .4 mile trail.  All was going well  . . we get  to the half way point and thought this was a good start to the day ... then as we continued hiking  and awhile later we realized we weren't in Kansas any more ... somehow we managed to cross over to the 2.0 mile trail so we ended up hiking for over TWO HOURS and over TWO MILES.  PHEW.  It was good for Princess P, she likes sleeping in her little backpack thing I wear with her so she got a GREAT morning nap that day but HOLY MOLY were we beat.   I have to give it to my three year old thought, he hiked over half of it before giving in and asking daddy to carry him on his shoulders.  lol.   Oh well, I needed the excercise given the amount of marshmellows I would be consuming later that night so it worked out.  Our 9 year old was just glad we didn't die out in the dessert, HA HA.  He kept asking me if I knew where we were and Hubby and I LAUGHED because I'm lucky if I know where I am six miles away from my driveway, no less another city in the middle of a dessert!!!

Here are photos from the great adventure! 

I need to be better about this ... I mean I can't possibly expect my husband to be as perfect as me!  LOL  My mom forwarded this to me in an email and for some reason it struck a chord in me tonight so I thought I'd pass it along.  I was going to post pictures of my camping trip but its taking them FOREVER to download so that will have to be moved to tomorrow's To Do's.  Enjoy:

When I was a little girl, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then.  And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his toast, smile at my mom and ask me how my day was at school.  I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite!

 

When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast.  And I'll never forget what he said: “Baby, I love burned toast.”

 

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his toast burned.  He wrapped me in his arms and said, “Your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired.  And besides a little burnt toast never hurt anyone!”

 

You know, life is full of imperfect things......and imperfect people.  I'm not the best housekeeper or cook.  What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults and choosing to celebrate each other's differences - is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

I can't believe I have let so many months come and go without kiddo updates.  UGH!

I would love to say that both kiddo updates would be in the paragraphs below; however, I am currently sweating my butt off because well us New Mexicans aren't used to humidity and we have had plenty of it and my computer is in the room with ZERO air conditioning soooo here is a quick post with a little slide show with pictures from earlier this week.

Love you all!

Okay ... so I only WISH I was perfect enough to be a center fold BUT thanks to Finding Equipoise I was able to determine that the number 1 song the day I was born was Centerfold by J. Geils Band.  I had never listened to that song before tonight ... but there it is! lol.

Find out yours here!

I haven't written in a while simply because I don't know what to say ... plus no one really seems to read my blog SO I figure I am only letting down one or two people by being absent.  ha ha.

I realized that we are in June ... the middle of the year so I thought I would check in with my self and my 2 readers on my New Year Resolutions .. so here we go.

Resolution  #1:

1. Strengthen my relationship with the Lord and share that closeness with my kids and help them develop a stronger closer relationship with Him.

This is probably the most important resolution and sadly its the one I have made the least progress with.  It's not because I don't want too rather I am sorta stuck and don't know what TO DO.  Nonetheless, it's stil a resolution/goal and I am not shying away from attacking this head on ... as soon as I figure out what to do!

Resolution #2:

2.  Get fit.  Don't confuse this with losing weight (although I wont be upset by that) rather I want to change my lifestyle and eating habits that will help my heart and body live a longer life and to also show my children that you can enjoy life and all its goodies without being out of shape.  I am determined to find the equipoise of being fit and eating my favorite brownies with white chocolate frosting!

I am happy to report that since April 1st I have lost 15 pounds ... My girlfriend is in from out of town this week so I think I have possibly gained 10 back but none the less, I have made great progress on my getting fit adventure.

Resolution #3:

3.  Continue with the family budget and find room for improvement.  As many of you know I am now a stay at home wife and have managed thus far to make a good/accurate budget that has allowed me to continue this way of life. 

So far so good ... there are some areas in which I need to improve on but overall, I am still home and we are still in the positive in our checking account.  lol.

Resolution #4:

4.  Vacation.  Unbeknown to my children we are attempting to go to DisneyWorld for Christmas 2009.  This is a huge expense therefore making #3 very important.  Also, I have two very good girlfriends that live out of state now and I am determined to go see at least one of them every year ... for one it will be a fun get away for me and second both of their familieis live here so when they come here I am don't get as much time with them as I think I am entitled would if I went to see them.  So be looking for me Finding Equipoise and Bittersweet!

Sadly, the Christmas vacation is not going to happen, sniffle.  But we are trying to plan little get aways with the kids over summer and then maybe take a little trip after the Holidays.  My Husbands work schedule is so not vacation friendly.

Resoution #5:

5. Staying in touch.  I have so many great people in my life that I don't get to talk to regularly mostly because I can't find the time to call or go visit so my plan is to send cards and letters out to friends regularly.  I will first make a list of all the folks I want to make sure get on my stay in touch list and then start sending out a weekly note and/or card to them via the good old US Postal Service.  I will go through my list and add people I have forgotten or have recently found in my life and then rinse and repeat. 

Well I haven't sent out notes on a weekly basis like I had wanted but I did get out a spring letter to everyone I normally send Christmas cards too which is about 35 people and so if you average that out .. its SORTA like a card a week.  lol.  I need to keep trying with this one. 

Well so there you have it folks ... my status on my resolution/goals.  Phew.  Halfway there and I am not doing half bad.  Not as good as I want but I have 6 more months to improve ... maybe checking in in the middle of the year will be just the motivation I need.

Love all two of you that read this.  :o)

I have three words for EVERYONE ... CLICK -N- PULL!

I have been a member of Sam's Club for going on six years now but Click-n-Pull was just made aware to me two weeks ago by my seester.  WTF?  Why didn't the damn grocery checker outers tell me this was an option available to me as they saw me there, monthly, struggling to get all my goods into one basket??  I think secretly they enjoy watching the little short girl try to see over her groceries AND infant seat (that makes the grocery cart 6 feet tall, WHO CAN SEE OVER THAT????) all while trying to navigate out  to the parking lot to my van.  I think the cart pushers have bets as to see how many items I drop, drag and/or push with my cart.  No kidding, time before last the milk came flying off the basket and I had to walk BACK into the store with a leaky bottle of milk and ask for a new one. 

ANYWAYS ... my problems are no more, my life is now 1000 times easier AND my spouse is happy cause I don't go over budget.  I am planning to launch my lawsuit against Sam's Club because I had this idea a decade ago but my over cynical husband didn't think it would fly.  But nonetheless, the shopping online and having someone else walk the store and pull your grociers is finally available!!  You Click-n-Pull and then walk up to member services, tell them your name and VWHOLA!  Your grocery shopping is done.  They even had me pull my van up to the "loading" area so the young little box boy could get my cart right up to the back of the van.  Man I coulda hugged that kid!! 

So now, I am able to blog to you this Saturday morning because Click-n-Pull has bought me 4 hours on a Saturday morning.

So Pretty + Click-n-Pull = Life Companions

Embracing Imperfection

I need to be better about this ... I mean I can't possibly expect my husband to be as perfect as me!  LOL  My mom forwarded this to me in an email and for some reason it struck a chord in me tonight so I thought I'd pass it along.  I was going to post pictures of my camping trip but its taking them FOREVER to download so that will have to be moved to tomorrow's To Do's.  Enjoy:

When I was a little girl, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then.  And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his toast, smile at my mom and ask me how my day was at school.  I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite!

 

When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast.  And I'll never forget what he said: “Baby, I love burned toast.”

 

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night and I asked him if he really liked his toast burned.  He wrapped me in his arms and said, “Your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired.  And besides a little burnt toast never hurt anyone!”

 

You know, life is full of imperfect things......and imperfect people.  I'm not the best housekeeper or cook.  What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other's faults and choosing to celebrate each other's differences - is one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing, and lasting relationship.

Good Intention; Bad Execution

I can't believe I have let so many months come and go without kiddo updates.  UGH!

I would love to say that both kiddo updates would be in the paragraphs below; however, I am currently sweating my butt off because well us New Mexicans aren't used to humidity and we have had plenty of it and my computer is in the room with ZERO air conditioning soooo here is a quick post with a little slide show with pictures from earlier this week.

Love you all!

Okay ... so I only WISH I was perfect enough to be a center fold BUT thanks to Finding Equipoise I was able to determine that the number 1 song the day I was born was Centerfold by J. Geils Band.  I had never listened to that song before tonight ... but there it is! lol.

Find out yours here!

I haven't written in a while simply because I don't know what to say ... plus no one really seems to read my blog SO I figure I am only letting down one or two people by being absent.  ha ha.

I realized that we are in June ... the middle of the year so I thought I would check in with my self and my 2 readers on my New Year Resolutions .. so here we go.

Resolution  #1:

1. Strengthen my relationship with the Lord and share that closeness with my kids and help them develop a stronger closer relationship with Him.

This is probably the most important resolution and sadly its the one I have made the least progress with.  It's not because I don't want too rather I am sorta stuck and don't know what TO DO.  Nonetheless, it's stil a resolution/goal and I am not shying away from attacking this head on ... as soon as I figure out what to do!

Resolution #2:

2.  Get fit.  Don't confuse this with losing weight (although I wont be upset by that) rather I want to change my lifestyle and eating habits that will help my heart and body live a longer life and to also show my children that you can enjoy life and all its goodies without being out of shape.  I am determined to find the equipoise of being fit and eating my favorite brownies with white chocolate frosting!

I am happy to report that since April 1st I have lost 15 pounds ... My girlfriend is in from out of town this week so I think I have possibly gained 10 back but none the less, I have made great progress on my getting fit adventure.

Resolution #3:

3.  Continue with the family budget and find room for improvement.  As many of you know I am now a stay at home wife and have managed thus far to make a good/accurate budget that has allowed me to continue this way of life. 

So far so good ... there are some areas in which I need to improve on but overall, I am still home and we are still in the positive in our checking account.  lol.

Resolution #4:

4.  Vacation.  Unbeknown to my children we are attempting to go to DisneyWorld for Christmas 2009.  This is a huge expense therefore making #3 very important.  Also, I have two very good girlfriends that live out of state now and I am determined to go see at least one of them every year ... for one it will be a fun get away for me and second both of their familieis live here so when they come here I am don't get as much time with them as I think I am entitled would if I went to see them.  So be looking for me Finding Equipoise and Bittersweet!

Sadly, the Christmas vacation is not going to happen, sniffle.  But we are trying to plan little get aways with the kids over summer and then maybe take a little trip after the Holidays.  My Husbands work schedule is so not vacation friendly.

Resoution #5:

5. Staying in touch.  I have so many great people in my life that I don't get to talk to regularly mostly because I can't find the time to call or go visit so my plan is to send cards and letters out to friends regularly.  I will first make a list of all the folks I want to make sure get on my stay in touch list and then start sending out a weekly note and/or card to them via the good old US Postal Service.  I will go through my list and add people I have forgotten or have recently found in my life and then rinse and repeat. 

Well I haven't sent out notes on a weekly basis like I had wanted but I did get out a spring letter to everyone I normally send Christmas cards too which is about 35 people and so if you average that out .. its SORTA like a card a week.  lol.  I need to keep trying with this one. 

Well so there you have it folks ... my status on my resolution/goals.  Phew.  Halfway there and I am not doing half bad.  Not as good as I want but I have 6 more months to improve ... maybe checking in in the middle of the year will be just the motivation I need.

Love all two of you that read this.  :o)

I have three words for EVERYONE ... CLICK -N- PULL!

I have been a member of Sam's Club for going on six years now but Click-n-Pull was just made aware to me two weeks ago by my seester.  WTF?  Why didn't the damn grocery checker outers tell me this was an option available to me as they saw me there, monthly, struggling to get all my goods into one basket??  I think secretly they enjoy watching the little short girl try to see over her groceries AND infant seat (that makes the grocery cart 6 feet tall, WHO CAN SEE OVER THAT????) all while trying to navigate out  to the parking lot to my van.  I think the cart pushers have bets as to see how many items I drop, drag and/or push with my cart.  No kidding, time before last the milk came flying off the basket and I had to walk BACK into the store with a leaky bottle of milk and ask for a new one. 

ANYWAYS ... my problems are no more, my life is now 1000 times easier AND my spouse is happy cause I don't go over budget.  I am planning to launch my lawsuit against Sam's Club because I had this idea a decade ago but my over cynical husband didn't think it would fly.  But nonetheless, the shopping online and having someone else walk the store and pull your grociers is finally available!!  You Click-n-Pull and then walk up to member services, tell them your name and VWHOLA!  Your grocery shopping is done.  They even had me pull my van up to the "loading" area so the young little box boy could get my cart right up to the back of the van.  Man I coulda hugged that kid!! 

So now, I am able to blog to you this Saturday morning because Click-n-Pull has bought me 4 hours on a Saturday morning.

So Pretty + Click-n-Pull = Life Companions

I'm a Centerfold!!

Okay ... so I only WISH I was perfect enough to be a center fold BUT thanks to Finding Equipoise I was able to determine that the number 1 song the day I was born was Centerfold by J. Geils Band.  I had never listened to that song before tonight ... but there it is! lol.

Find out yours here!

Checking In ...

I haven't written in a while simply because I don't know what to say ... plus no one really seems to read my blog SO I figure I am only letting down one or two people by being absent.  ha ha.

I realized that we are in June ... the middle of the year so I thought I would check in with my self and my 2 readers on my New Year Resolutions .. so here we go.

Resolution  #1:

1. Strengthen my relationship with the Lord and share that closeness with my kids and help them develop a stronger closer relationship with Him.

This is probably the most important resolution and sadly its the one I have made the least progress with.  It's not because I don't want too rather I am sorta stuck and don't know what TO DO.  Nonetheless, it's stil a resolution/goal and I am not shying away from attacking this head on ... as soon as I figure out what to do!

Resolution #2:

2.  Get fit.  Don't confuse this with losing weight (although I wont be upset by that) rather I want to change my lifestyle and eating habits that will help my heart and body live a longer life and to also show my children that you can enjoy life and all its goodies without being out of shape.  I am determined to find the equipoise of being fit and eating my favorite brownies with white chocolate frosting!

I am happy to report that since April 1st I have lost 15 pounds ... My girlfriend is in from out of town this week so I think I have possibly gained 10 back but none the less, I have made great progress on my getting fit adventure.

Resolution #3:

3.  Continue with the family budget and find room for improvement.  As many of you know I am now a stay at home wife and have managed thus far to make a good/accurate budget that has allowed me to continue this way of life. 

So far so good ... there are some areas in which I need to improve on but overall, I am still home and we are still in the positive in our checking account.  lol.

Resolution #4:

4.  Vacation.  Unbeknown to my children we are attempting to go to DisneyWorld for Christmas 2009.  This is a huge expense therefore making #3 very important.  Also, I have two very good girlfriends that live out of state now and I am determined to go see at least one of them every year ... for one it will be a fun get away for me and second both of their familieis live here so when they come here I am don't get as much time with them as I think I am entitled would if I went to see them.  So be looking for me Finding Equipoise and Bittersweet!

Sadly, the Christmas vacation is not going to happen, sniffle.  But we are trying to plan little get aways with the kids over summer and then maybe take a little trip after the Holidays.  My Husbands work schedule is so not vacation friendly.

Resoution #5:

5. Staying in touch.  I have so many great people in my life that I don't get to talk to regularly mostly because I can't find the time to call or go visit so my plan is to send cards and letters out to friends regularly.  I will first make a list of all the folks I want to make sure get on my stay in touch list and then start sending out a weekly note and/or card to them via the good old US Postal Service.  I will go through my list and add people I have forgotten or have recently found in my life and then rinse and repeat. 

Well I haven't sent out notes on a weekly basis like I had wanted but I did get out a spring letter to everyone I normally send Christmas cards too which is about 35 people and so if you average that out .. its SORTA like a card a week.  lol.  I need to keep trying with this one. 

Well so there you have it folks ... my status on my resolution/goals.  Phew.  Halfway there and I am not doing half bad.  Not as good as I want but I have 6 more months to improve ... maybe checking in in the middle of the year will be just the motivation I need.

Love all two of you that read this.  :o)

Click -n- Pull

I have three words for EVERYONE ... CLICK -N- PULL!

I have been a member of Sam's Club for going on six years now but Click-n-Pull was just made aware to me two weeks ago by my seester.  WTF?  Why didn't the damn grocery checker outers tell me this was an option available to me as they saw me there, monthly, struggling to get all my goods into one basket??  I think secretly they enjoy watching the little short girl try to see over her groceries AND infant seat (that makes the grocery cart 6 feet tall, WHO CAN SEE OVER THAT????) all while trying to navigate out  to the parking lot to my van.  I think the cart pushers have bets as to see how many items I drop, drag and/or push with my cart.  No kidding, time before last the milk came flying off the basket and I had to walk BACK into the store with a leaky bottle of milk and ask for a new one. 

ANYWAYS ... my problems are no more, my life is now 1000 times easier AND my spouse is happy cause I don't go over budget.  I am planning to launch my lawsuit against Sam's Club because I had this idea a decade ago but my over cynical husband didn't think it would fly.  But nonetheless, the shopping online and having someone else walk the store and pull your grociers is finally available!!  You Click-n-Pull and then walk up to member services, tell them your name and VWHOLA!  Your grocery shopping is done.  They even had me pull my van up to the "loading" area so the young little box boy could get my cart right up to the back of the van.  Man I coulda hugged that kid!! 

So now, I am able to blog to you this Saturday morning because Click-n-Pull has bought me 4 hours on a Saturday morning.

So Pretty + Click-n-Pull = Life Companions